An anonymous person or group took the time last week to lovingly create a realistic-looking Vancouver Park Board sign and temporarily rechristen Guelph Park as “Dude Chilling Park.”
K&K would like to think it is the same individual responsible for dressing various Stanley Park statues in Canucks sweaters during the 2011 playoffs and who faxed media outlets a fake park board press release a few years back claiming “Asian miniature deer” were being introduced into Queen Elizabeth Park to help control the coyote population.
While we take issue with the use of the singular “dude” — when Courier shutterbug Dan Toulgoet stopped by, for example, there were actually several dudes chilling and one in particular was so committed to the endeavour that an ambulance had been called — we nonetheless applaud the initiative.
Certainly Dude Chilling is a more descriptive moniker for the Mount Pleasant green space than Guelph and, although we would never encourage vandalism what with it being illegal and all, we couldn’t help think of a few other ideas for freshening up Vancouver parks with new signs:
• Putting up Dude Grilling Park signs near the public barbecues in Kitsilano and Jericho Beach.
• Putting up Nude Chilling Park signs at Wreck Beach.
• Reigniting the long-simmering Spanish Bank/Spanish Banks controversy by slapping an S back on the end of official signs and letting the chips fall where they may.
• Renaming green space in the blossoming Korean neighbourhood near Denman and Robson “Richard Park” in honour of the underappreciated, Seoul-born forward who spent the 2005-2006 NHL season with the Canucks.
• No Lifeguard on Duty signs for Jack Poole Plaza.
• Changing the John Hendry Park sign to Trout Lake Park and seeing if anyone notices.
• Putting up Dunbar Residents Only signs around Dunbar parks and taking bets on how long before a grassroots heritage committee forms to keep them.
• Adding the word “Muntz” to signs at Nelson Park so that people can point to them and say “Ha-ha!“
• Turn CRAB Park at Portside to CRAP Park at Portside to give visitors fair warning that not all local dog owners are as diligent as they should be when it comes to picking up after their pooches.
• Renaming Hastings Community Park as East Village Community Park, although it’s quite possible the Hastings North Business Improvement Association might have already gone ahead and done this without asking anyone first.
• Coming up with something, anything, more interesting for the seven different park board sites around the city officially known only as “Park Site.”
(This post was first published in Kudos & Kvetches © Copyright (c) Vancouver Courier)